


Not Today

by sakuranomi808



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-24
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:01:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27695270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sakuranomi808/pseuds/sakuranomi808
Summary: Written a very long time ago for a SPN kink meme prompt: "J2, fire fighters, slow intimate sex, manhandling, top!Jared: J2 are fire fighters, after a really long and hard night where Jensen thought that he would lose Jared he needs Jared to make love to him. Sensual sex between two firefighters please. Jared proves to Jensen that he is still here and nothing will break them apart."
Relationships: Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Comments: 4
Kudos: 160





	Not Today

**Author's Note:**

> Digging through my fic archives, I stumbled across this one that I posted to LJ in 2012 (!) in response to a kink meme prompt. I honestly don't remember writing this (mom brain is real, guys) but I thought it was a nice little standalone fic, so I decided to share it here <3

There are nights made of pure adrenaline and exhilaration, nothing but high-fives all around and the thrill and contentment that comes with being a hero. More often than not, there are nights spent hanging around the station – just mundane, everyday things like fixing supper and playing cards with the guys afterward to pass the time.

And then there are nights like this.

Jensen cringes as he shrugs out of his jacket, instinctively reaching up with his other hand to prod gently at his throbbing shoulder. He exhales shakily and lets the Kevlar slip to the ground in a heap of bright yellow singed with black. There's still a gritty layer of dirt and ash covering his body, staining his clothes, and suddenly the material is too hot, too tight – stifling against his heated skin. Jensen swiftly tugs his t-shirt up over his head and off, rumples it into a ball and hurls it onto the mattress. His eyes remain stubbornly glued to the floor as he strides over to the bed and flops down onto it, but his gaze snaps up when he hears the door creak open.

“Hey,” Jared says softly.

“Don't,” Jensen cuts in sharply, regretting his tone as soon as the word escapes.

The mattress dips under Jared's weight, and the floor blurs entirely out of focus when the younger man's arm slides around Jensen's shoulders, squeezing tight. “I'm sorry,” he murmurs. “But I- I had to. You know that, right? I couldn't live with myself if I didn't.”

“I know,” Jensen murmurs, words escaping almost against his own will.

Still, the fact remains – it wasn't supposed to be like this. Wasn't supposed to mean a damned thing – just a fling, a passing romance too many summers ago, a story he shouldn't want to tell anymore. Sure as hell isn't supposed to hurt so fucking much to almost lose him like this – over and over and over again.

“I called the hospital,” Jensen goes on, barely recognizing the sound of his own gravel-rough voice in his ears. “The kid's in intensive care, but they think she's gonna pull through. The mom's gonna be okay, too. I just... every time I watch you run back in like that, I just can't help but think it... you know? That maybe this is the last time?”

“It never is though,” Jared says softly.

“It will be someday,” Jensen whispers, voice breaking on just the thought.

“Not today.”

Jared tugs Jensen closer against his side and leans over to press his lips against the older man's temple, letting them come to rest there. After a moment, he reaches up to brush his thumb over the moisture staining Jensen's cheek, just a whisper-soft touch that's more comforting than it has any right to be.

“But-”

“Not today,” Jared repeats firmly.

He wants to scream at him, shake him until it knocks some sense into his head, but instead he just crushes their lips together, hard and hungry, more desperation and want than anything else. Jared sucks in a startled gasp and flinches, but then he relaxes into it until their tongues are twisting together, moving in tandem with practiced ease.

It's been smoldering under the surface of his skin – this need, white-hot and painful – since the moment Jared laid his hands on him, since before that even. Jensen pushes deeper into the sweet warmth of Jared's mouth, chasing after the safety and comfort that he's only ever been able to find here. Slowly, the ache deep inside him begins to dissipate, like bright orange embers floating up into the midnight sky. It doesn't make sense – like water on fire or shooting stars that shoot back – but then again, none of it ever has, not when it comes to Jared.

Jared drapes his arms around Jensen's shoulders and then pushes, spreading him out over the rumpled bedsheets. He slides his hands up the length of the older man's arms to push them over his head, then laces their fingers together and settles down between his spread thighs, pressing the long, hard line of his body against Jensen's. It should be stifling – the bulk and weight of Jared's body pressing him into the mattress all the way from shoulder to ankle – but it's just the opposite, pure comfort in the best way possible. He inhales deeply, breathing in the heady, masculine scent of Jared all around him.

He exhales shakily and can't help but moan into it when Jared presses their lips together again. Jared slides his tongue gently along the seam of Jensen's lips before dipping in slowly – once, twice, three times – sending tremors of anticipation racing down Jensen's spine. He reaches back to push himself halfway upright, dragging one hand up to thread through the tousled mess of Jared's hair, trying to draw him in closer still. He's only vaguely aware of Jared's hands sliding down to tug impatiently at his pants, until the younger man huffs loudly in frustration and pulls away enough to glare down between them.

There's no time to react when Jared tears at the hooks and clasps and then yanks the material down so hard that Jensen's arms buckle under him. He sucks in a surprised gasp when his back hits the mattress, but still he obediently lifts his hips and helps to kick the tattered material off. Jensen watches wide-eyed as Jared pushes himself up to his knees and fumbles to get his own shirt up and off, hands trembling as he finally manages to get his own pants off as well.

Jared stops for a moment and hesitates, just blinks a few times as he continues to force ragged breaths in and out of his lungs. He's perfect, beautiful, everything Jensen never knew he was looking for until it was right there in front of him. And finally – finally, here with the pale quarter-moon drawing angled blue shadows over Jared's face – the day's pain and loss melt entirely away, turning into nothing but ash and memories.

Jared smiles faintly and drops down to press his lips against Jensen's, slow and sweet and unhurried. The shift in the mood between them is palpable, but it shouldn't surprise him, not when Jared's been his other half, the proverbial missing piece since the day they met. Jensen settles back against the pillows and draws his knees up closer to his chest, sighing in contentment when Jared reaches over into the nightstand drawer and returns with a bottle of lube.

His hands are sure and steady, working carefully to pop the cap open and pour some of the clear liquid onto slender fingers. Jensen sucks in a startled gasp at the chill that runs through him when Jared slides those slippery fingertips over his balls and a bit further back to press against his opening. Jared tugs his lip between his teeth, forehead creasing in obvious concentration as he increases the pressure slightly, just continuing to swirl the pads of his fingers in slow, gentle circles.

A smile tugs at the corners of Jensen's lips and his heart twists behind his ribcage when it suddenly hits him – just what a stark contrast this is with the fearless, strapping young man that everyone else sees. But Jared's the same person now that he's always been underneath – same stubborn, hard-headed kid who followed Jensen halfway across the country as soon as he was old enough to, big as a tree but gentle as the breeze flowing through its leaves.

“Go on, baby,” Jensen whispers. “I'm ready.”

Jared nods slightly – just a barely-there jerk of his chin – before his finger breaches the tight ring of muscle. It's been a long time, so the burn and stretch is slightly more pronounced, but Jensen nods anyway and quietly asks, “One more.”

Jared moves slowly, carefully, twisting and scissoring his fingers over and over again for several maddening minutes until Jensen is writhing beneath him, perspiration beading on his forehead, tickling slightly as it rolls down his heated skin.

“My God,” Jensen finally huffs. “C'mon, already.” He gives his best effort at an indignant glare, but it fails miserably when Jared smiles – dimples carved deep, eyes sparkling with barely-veiled mischief – and Jensen can't help but mirror the grin. He watches silently as Jared carefully draws his fingers out and focuses on slicking up his own cock for a few moments.

They both hold their breaths as Jared pushes forward, bracing his weight on one outstretched palm and using the other hand to gently push the thickest part of his cock-head passed the natural resistance of Jensen's body. It's incredibly intimate – gradually opening up around his lover's hard, throbbing flesh until they're connected in every sense of the word – hearts naturally falling into the same cadence once Jared's entire length is sheathed inside him.

Jensen reaches up to sweep the sweat-damp strands of hair away from Jared's forehead, smiling when the younger man instinctively leans into his touch. Jared shifts slightly, pushing himself up to rest his weight on his forearms, and Jensen can't help but flinch at the quiet thud of sterling silver that slips down the chain around Jared's neck to rest between them. He's never taken it off – not even once – since Jensen gave it to him the night they graduated from the Academy.

Jensen exhales shakily, eyes fluttering shut as Jared begins to move. He startles slightly at the sudden sensation of Jared's hand curling around his cock, but the pleasure that races down his spine in response more than makes up for it. Jared tightens his grip slightly, purposely rubbing the pad of his thumb over the sensitive bundle of nerves just under the swollen crown on every up-stroke.

It's instinct more than anything else when Jensen begins to rock his hips up against each of Jared's downward thrusts, mirroring each of his movements, the same give-and-take that defines them in every possible way. The pleasure is amazing, blooming hot and beautiful just under the surface of his skin, sending tremors of arousal racing up and down his spine. Jared steadily increases his pace – pushing them both closer and closer – until they're rutting together frantically, chasing after the pleasure lingering just barely out of reach. He leans down and crushes their lips together again, and ultimately that's what pushes Jensen over the edge, punching the air from his lungs as he moans brokenly into Jared's mouth.

Even as Jared's cock swells inside him and his movements jerk to an erratic stop, he continues to work Jensen through it, twisting his fist on every upstroke, squeezing rhythmically under his swollen cock-head. His sticky-wet release shoots hot between them, pulsing over his fist and smearing between Jared's fingers and onto Jensen’s own stomach. He forces his eyes open to watch the pleasure tear across Jared’s face, twisting his features as his bitten-raw lips open and close around ragged breaths of air.

It's suddenly incredibly quiet, so much that Jensen can almost hear the rhythm of his lover's heart beating in rapid tandem against his own. It could be seconds – could be minutes, or maybe hours – that pass between them, but it doesn't matter. Here in the safe, tranquil blanket of night wrapped tight around them, they're just Jared and Jensen again – two small-town boys who happen to risk their lives every day for the chance to make a difference.

“Jensen?” Jared whispers, snapping him from the thoughts tumbling around in his head.

Jensen's eyes flutter open and his gaze instantly sweeps up to Jared's face as the younger man tugs his lip between his teeth, seemingly lost for words. Jared’s eyes drop down to the engraved pendant resting between them and he pauses for a second, voice caught in his throat, before he whispers, “Always. You know that, right?”

“Yeah,” Jensen easily replies. “I know.”

“I think about it too,” Jared admits quietly, voice barely audible. “Losing you, I mean.”

“And...?” Jensen urges gently.

“And it scares the crap outta me. Every single time. But it's worth it, Jen. We both damn well know it is.”

Jensen exhales shakily and nods, letting his eyes slide shut, finally succumbing to the exhaustion settling over him. “I love you,” he whispers. “More than you know.”

He had a different future once – made of stock options and a corner office with a view – that crumbled into fire and ash one morning when he woke up late and missed his train into the city. His fate lies here now – uncertain, and as beautiful as it is frightening – in sparkling gold-flecked hazel eyes bright enough to light up even the darkest night.

**Author's Note:**

> Additional head!canon / back story: 
> 
> Jensen and Jared got together when they were relatively young, maybe late high school / early college (their age difference could be just a couple of years here instead of the four in real life). Jensen moved to New York City after graduating from college and broke things off with Jared. He worked for about a year in an office at the World Trade Center and could’ve died on 9/11 except that he just happened to be running late that morning.
> 
> He decided to become a firefighter after that (felt like he needed to make more of a difference in the world) and also realized what an idiot he was to break things off with Jared just because of the distance and age difference between them. As it turns out, Jared never really got over him anyway; he was just waiting until he graduated so he could move across the country to be with Jensen. So they got back together and they both ended up going through the Academy at the same time. 
> 
> The pendant Jared wears is a St. Florian medal (protector of firefighters) and was a graduation gift that Jensen gave him.


End file.
